"YOU KNOW YOU ARE A GOAN WHEN"

1. No matter where you go in the world you will find another goan named D’Costa, D’Mello, D’Souza, Fernandes, Monteiro or Rodrigues.
2. You have six middle names, most of which you can’t pronounce.
3. You have annoying nicknames like Petus, Babush (or Busha), Bostiao, Forsulo or Popot!
4. You are really confused if you are Portuguese….. heaven forbid Indian!
5. You call everybody who is brown and not goan “bintkar” and make fun of them in konkani.
6. You interject “what”, “man”, and “re”(ray) in every line of your conversation
7. You show you are listening to the conversation by saying “really?!” or “what youre saying”
8. You call an older person you’ve never met before “uncle” or “auntie” everyone is a family friend
9. One club is not enough to cater to 10 goans
10. Your family is fighting over property they inherited from someone else. Your mother has a minor disagreement with her sister and doesn’t talk with her for 10 years
11. You think you can sing
12. You make tea in a saucepan
13. You eat onions with everything
14. You get excited when “king fish” or "Promfret" is mentioned
15. You eat last night’s curry the next morning
16. You call mangoes by Portuguese names
17. You see pictures of the Caribbean or Hawaii and you say “it’s just like Goa”
18. You get very upset when the airlines refuse to accept your luggage which is
40 lbs overweight.
19. You go back to Goa and people treat you like a member of the royal family
20. You are comfortable going back for a holiday in May just to sample the mangoes, jackfruits, cantons, bibes, and the miscut.
21. You have to wash your butt no matter where you are , toilet paper does not do.